Parody News: BREAKING: Rob Gronkowski Has Been Ruled Out For Chiefs Game

Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports
Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

The hits just keep piling up for the New England Patriots, as they get ready for their Divisional Round match up against the Kansas City Chiefs. 

It appears as if Rob Gronkowski will be out for the game against the Chiefs. It's quite a shame too, because Gronk has really found his groove as the Sheriff in the weekly game of Cowboys and Indians he plays with his ballerina friends.

Gronk has been ruled out for this upcoming game against the Chiefs, due to having an unregistered plastic gun. The Cowboys are now underdogs for the fairyfest against the Chiefs on this upcoming dog day afternoon. Also let me state, that these are the Cowboys and NOT the Dallas Cowboys. Let me state that one more time, these are not the Dallas Cowboys.

Anyways as far as the unregistered toy gun, well all I have to say is thanks a lot Obama. Luckily for the Cowboys, Donald Trump has offered to build a Great Wall Of China for them.

In other strange news, Patriots DE Chandler Jones was found on Gronks rooftop yesteryear screaming "I am a golden god" at the top of his lungs. Then he kept complaining about not being able to catch a dragon or something.

That's it for now. Once again I must state the Cowboys in the game of Cowboys and Indians are not the Dallas Cowboys. I can't stress this enough.

The preceding was a parody article for entertainment purposes only.