Parody News: BREAKING: Brock Lesnar Dyes After Road Rage Incident

Joshua Dahl-USA TODAY Sports

Brock Lesnar had been a huge headline in the news in the past few days, after his alleged doping violation for his UFC 200 match against Mark Hunt. Now Lesnar finds himself back in the news today.

Lesnar has dyed after a road rage incident he just had seven seconds ago. Using the 'Back To The Future' time paradox, Lesnar just got into a road rage incident with 10 year old Charlotte Tenn. Lesnar was rear-ended by the driving child and became upset when he found out that the little brat was driving a gas-guzzling hummer. After some words exchanged, Lesnar gave his finishing move the 'F-5' to the child on the concrete. The kid died (DIED) immediatly.

Lesnar then went home and dyed his hair green to show he cares about the environment and stuff. Lesnar's upcoming WWE Summerslam match against Randy Orton may be in jeopardy from Lesnar killing that kid, but nothing will probably come of it seeing as nobody liked that girl since she was a booger-picker.

There will be a #Boogerpickerlivesmatter protest at the white house later this millennium.

The preceding was a parody article for entertainment purposes only.