Parody News: BREAKING: Robert Griffin III Abruptly Decides To Retire From NFL

Ken Blaze-USA TODAY Sports

The sky was the limit for Robert Griffin III when he was drafted second overall by the Washington Redskins in the 2012 NFL Draft. 

Griffin appeared set to be the next big thing during his rookie season, but injuries and behind the scenes drama, derailed Griffins stint with the Dreadskins. After being released by the Skinnie's, Griffin was hoping that some dumb team would give him a second chance. Enter the Cleveland Browns.

Seeing as if the Browns don't have a QB that is better, or a QB for the past 15 years in fact, Griffin is the favorite to be the starter for the 2016 season. Change 'is' for 'was' because Griffin has decided to retire. In an unprepared statement, Griffin had this to say...

"I just woke up one day and was like I'm playing QB for the Browns? What's happened with my life? I got a call the other day for a job offer to be assistant janitor at the Veal slaughtering plant. The decision for me was mad easy son. Sure I'll be taking like a 95% pay decrease, but it beats being QB for the Browns"

The Browns are planning on bringing back QB Johnny Manziel and giving him a huge money contract in hopes that turns the young mans attitude around. In related news Manziel is throwing a huge party that he's calling "Illegal Stuff till 6 in the morning"

The preceding was a parody article for entertainment purposes only.