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Falsity News: BREAKING: Mark "The Undertaker" Calloway Dyes After Motorcycle Crash

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WireImage

Mark Calloway who is better known as 'The Undertaker' has had an absolutely legendary career in the WWE. It comes with a heavy heart that we must report that the Undertaker has dyed.

Undertaker was riding his bike (or chopper as some people say, not to be confused with heli-choppers or jalapeno choppers that they serve at those stupid chain restaurants like Chili's and TGI Fridays. Seriously, those places suck. Never order anything other than a burger or mozzarella sticks or something. Even those morons can't screw up stuff like that. Anyway, what the hell was I talking about before this inner monologue? Oh that's right the Undertaker, back to the program)

So the Undertaker was riding his jalapeno chopper when he crashed, of course he was only going about five miles per hour and just hit a bike rack. Apparently the Underwearmaker was distracted by a group of bicycle riding emo kids that were crying about being sensitive or not sensitive enough or something.

The Blundertaker was inspired though, he figured if he was more sensitive like those little wienie emo kids, that maybe he'd be a happier guy. So, the Undertaker dyed his hair pink to show people that he has a feminine side.

In the words of the Tumblershaker "Rest in piece to all of you macho pigs that can't embrace your feminine side. Try watching 'The Gilmore Girls' seriously it's a good show"

For anyone who might have been confused by the headline don't be worried the Over/Undertaker isn't dead, although quite a few of you always get dye and die mixed up for some reason. Which leads us to........

The preceding was a parody article for entertainment purposes only.  


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