Falsity News: BREAKING: David Price To Sign With New York Yankees

Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports
Kim Klement-USA TODAY Sports

The Toronto Blue Jays traded for all star pitcher David Price before last seasons trade deadline. The move helped the Jays break a long playoff drought and get to the ALCS where they would lose to the eventual World Series Champion Kansas City Royals.

Now it appears as if the New York Yankees will be opening up their pocket book and throwing all kinds of dope money at Price. According to Pete Roseycheeks, the Yankees will pay Price 157 million Milwaukee bucks over the course of three millennials. 

In addition the Yankees will also sign Zack Greinke, Johnny Cueto, Chris Davis, and pretty much every other free agent out there.

The Yankees will request that the 2016 season be cancelled and that the World Series trophy be brought to them immediately, along with the release of several influential Russian leaders that are currently in prison. If the Yankees demands aren't met by 1:00 on whatever day this is, then they'll force every movie theater in America to play nothing but Rob Schneider movies. Oh the humanity!

The preceding was a parody article for entertainment purposes only.