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Falsity News: BREAKING: Aaron Hernandez Dyes In Prison

Just recently Aaron Hernandez found himself in the headlines again, after a prison shank was found in his cell. As we all know the former New England Patriot is serving life in prison for murder.

Well, Hernandez is back in the headlines once again. Earlier today Hernandez dyed in prison. Yes, Hernandez has dyed his hair blonde.

You see, after Hernandez was thrown into solitary confinement, he realized that he had to make some changes. Previously, Hernandez was a part of the prison gang "Los Pollos Hermanos" or "The Chicken Brothers" in English. The gang got it's inspiration from the hit TV show Breaking Bad. Needless to say, they're known to be some mean characters that offer people drink refills while keeping the same blank emotionless face all the time.

Hernandez announced to the media through the plot hole in his cell that he was dying his hair blonde in an attempt to join the Backstreet Boys. This is not the boy band, but a new gang in the prison that uses the power of positivity and spontaneous dance numbers. Hernandez feels like he could add some much needed muscle to the group seeing as a lot of the other guys in prison call them the "Backdoor Boys".

Should be interesting to see what happens when the Herny gets out solitary. Speaking of solitary, isn't that a great card game? Great for parties and family gatherings. That's it! Have a happy Thanksgiving. 

The preceding was a parody article for entertainment purposes only.


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