Roman Reigns looks to be on his way to a lengthy run as WWE Heavyweight Champion, after winning the title from Sheamus on the latest edition of Monday Night Raw.
It looks as if Reigns will be suspended and will have to vacate the title. Of course Reigns isn't being suspended from the WWE or having to vacate his WWE title, but instead Reigns is being suspended from the Crisco Company. As we all know Crisco is one of the most popular vegetable oils on the market.
For years Reigns has been pouring Crisco on his hair before matches, but recently switched to Donald Trump brand grease. The republican candidate has been greasing people his whole life, so he decided to finally start selling real grease. I guess in the words of Virgil DiBiase 'Everybody's got a price. (Evil laughter)'. And Reigns had his.
Reigns had recently taken the title for greasiest hair from the great Bret Hart, but seeing as Reigns breached his contract with Crisco his title will now be vacated. Crisco will be holding a game of Twister to crown a new champion in the next couple of minutes.
In other news.....This is awesome (clap clap clap clap clap).
The preceding was a parody article for entertainment purposes only.